Martini Mamas | Mom-Guilt Free Zone

Balancing Motherhood and Personal Success: Navigating Spiritual Seasons and Self-Discovery

July 07, 2023 Reka
Martini Mamas | Mom-Guilt Free Zone
Balancing Motherhood and Personal Success: Navigating Spiritual Seasons and Self-Discovery
Show Notes Transcript Chapter Markers

 After a rejuvenating vacation, I've been reflecting on balancing personal success and family. Let's chat about spiritual seasons and reaching our true potential.

Do you ever find yourself lacking motivation? Trust me; you're not alone. It's during these times that the power of self-discipline becomes paramount. We dive into the intricacies of spiritual growth and how embracing the journey with self-compassion can help us unearth that elusive balance between being a mom and fulfilling our personal goals. From harnessing the support of loved ones to carving out time for self-discovery, join me as we explore aligning our dreams with our purpose while remembering that success is a personal journey, not a race.

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Speaker 1:

What's better than a regular happy hour? How about an ultimate happy hour for moms? Martini Mama's podcast is a weekly hangout for modern mamas to discuss mom-ahood work-life balance, blended families and self-care. So whether you're looking for advice, community or a new bestie, you are in the right place. Cheers.

Speaker 2:

Welcome back to another episode of the Martini Mama's podcast. It's your girl, rika, and today we're going to be talking about balancing motherhood and personal success. We're going to explore the concept of spiritual seasons and the importance of self-discipline when you just not motivated, like you just ain't got it. Now, before we get into this topic, let me just let y'all know your girl just came back off a vacation. I'm feeling myself. I got a different glow and bounce in my step. But what really sparked this conversation was when I was on vacation.

Speaker 2:

I like to take time to just kind of be and think about, ok, what is to come. I'm making new business goals, new personal goals, and I found myself reflecting. But in my reflection, in my self-reflection that is, i was just like I don't know if what I'm doing is what I'm supposed to be doing And if I should keep doing it. And it was just so many questions that I had for myself And I just, i just had this yearning of like wanting to be in position and not miss my spot. Have y'all ever been like that, like you are wanting for greater And you're just feeling like man. This is my season, like my season for preparation is over And now. It's just it is time and you're feeling like it's time, but the season hasn't changed to show that it's time. That was me And it I'm so grateful.

Speaker 2:

I was talking to a family member. Shout out to Marcy, let me tell you. When I tell you she gathered me, y'all got me all the way together, like girl, like keep swimming. You ain't even in a deep end yet, like you, still in a shallow end, keep going. And I think for many of us, that's how it is when, when we are believing for greater, we have these big goals And sometimes we think that you know, we in it, and it's just like, nah, you could just literally stand up, like you, still in shallow waters, keep going. And so it made me want to have this conversation with you all, with my tribe, and so I will tell you, balancing motherhood and having personal aspirations is something that many women struggle with. It's just a fact. I know that I'm not the only woman going out of like, thinking like you know what, how I'm going to make this thing happen when I still have to raise these kids, and and not wanting to put your dreams on the back burner. And so when we are in motherhood, i think we all will agree that it's this transformative journey that requires so much dedication of just like, time and love and, you know, nurturing from from us, but we also got to remember that we all those same things back to ourselves.

Speaker 2:

The first question I really truly had to ask myself was what is success to you? For a lot of people, success could just be as simple as you losing weight, or you getting a job, or you just accomplishing the goal, but I know for certain that success looks different for everybody. It does, and so I offer you and encourage you to ask yourself that, to make sure that you're not competing with someone else's success. You're competing to get to your success, and I think it's important that we remember that, just because we're moms, we don't have to sacrifice our dreams and not be a good mom Like the duality of motherhood. You can do both. Now that we are in this thing of like, what is success? Well, let's look at the definition. So success is defined as the ability to reach your goals in life, whatever those goals may be, like I mentioned before, it could be money, it could be fame, it could be relationship, personal goals. The key thing that I want you to know is that your success is defined by you, girl, like you can redefine and pivot, and I think it's. We need to understand also that it's power in the pivot. So many times I've had to pivot in situations thinking like, oh man, it's leading me down this road, let me go here. And nope, it was like complete halt, stop, do not pass, go, do not collect $200. And you have to be nimble enough to know and have discernment enough to know like, okay, enough is enough.

Speaker 2:

So, as a mother, we experience various spiritual seasons, whether it's a season of just, you know, solely focusing on raising our children. It could be seasons of, like, intense nurturing, when we're just like, okay, this baby requires so much of me. But it also can be the season for self reflection and self discovery, periods of aligning with our purpose beyond motherhood. And for me, that's where I'm at. I am in this season of aligning with my purpose, that is, beyond motherhood, and recognizing that these seasons really helps not only navigate you but navigate me and my journey, and I also, in the midst of these journeys, have a greater awareness for self and grace. I'm like sometimes I got to sit down and like just thank God for just grace. Let me let y'all know. So we're like I told you, we're on vacation And while we're on vacation we did this like huge prayer.

Speaker 2:

Right Before we always travel, we do a prayer, pray over the kids, just pray over our travels and just things to come Y'all, when I tell y'all that this has been the most up down but most refreshing vacation that I've taken in a very long time with the kids. We get to Philly, we get after a long day of travel, get the hotel room, we think in the hotel room is great And it's not to the point where it doesn't even have curtains. We were so tired that we didn't even realize it didn't have curtains till the sun was coming through the shades at like 5 am And I go to like shut the curtains. I'm like there's no curtains. We get down to the front desk to check out And they were like, okay, well, don't worry about it, we'll comp you your room. And that was just one situation.

Speaker 2:

Every other time after that it was like kind of showing me that no matter what I'm doing, where I'm going, god is in the midst. And so I think that is like one of the biggest things and the biggest lessons that we all have to learn is that when things are not going our way, when it just seems like, oh man, it couldn't get no worse. Y'all. It went from us having an Airbnb with bed bugs that we had to immediately leave to HGTV, flipped home with, you know, a slide that had. They had a slide from the third floor that went down to the kids playroom. This place was insane, but I was just like when we just stay on the path and realize that God is in the mist of everything that we do, he's going to bless us beyond measure.

Speaker 2:

That is something only comes when you're going through the seasons and winter. There's really nothing going on in winter. Winter is a period of isolation. Winter is a period of like stillness. Right, that may be your season, it may be summertime, but, baby, you might be feeling very isolated in this moment and and feeling like man, i just, i just feel like I'm by myself. No, honey, you are just in, like God has you tucked away.

Speaker 2:

Can we go on to spring? spring is when you, you, you start getting things and you start corn really back into yourself. Your relationship with God deepens, your relationship with your partner deepens, the relationship with yourself deepens. You start doing all of the things for you, and it then begins to overflow to different aspects, but like you're just planting things, planting seeds, watering things that needs nurturing, like that's your spring. And then here comes summer and you know things are starting to blossom, you know we outside and and it's almost that what you so now you're reaping and then you get into fall, and it's not that you are falling off, but more so that you're settling into who exactly you need to be for this season, that version of you. And another thing we have to realize is that each year there is a better version that will be resurrected. Oh, like the best version of you you haven't even met yet, because you're still, you still might be in your preparation season.

Speaker 2:

Girl, don't stress God, i know what he's doing. So I had to tell myself that like I am coming out of the you know um, i would say out of my winter, and now I'm in my spring, but I'm rushing to get to my fall, like I'm rushing to settle into that. You know that it, girl, and it's like I like no, like you, can't skip it. There's no shortcuts in business. There's no shortcuts in motherhood. I hope I broke that down for y'all. I hope that's a blessing for somebody out there. Okay, look, we have to really cultivate mindfulness when we're going through these seasons and self-awareness, and we do that by regularly checking in ourselves and having enough discernment to cut off things that are not serving me in that season. Every day, you should be sitting with yourself and understanding what you're doing, and even if you can't do it every day, do it weekly. Find space in your schedule where you just focus on you, making sure that your priorities and your goals are really aligning with where you are trying to go, where you are being led to go, and embracing self-compassion along the way. One of the things that we fail at is that when we're going through whatever season, we don't seek support from loved ones, like ask for help. It is like when you know that, hey, at this period of time I just I don't have the capacity to say that I rather somebody be honest with me, be like you know what, at this time I just I can't, i just don't have the space to do it. Cool, mark that thing down. You have not cause. You asked, not I'll, you know, run back that. But just know that every person, even in marriages, you guys, are evolving at different pieces And that's a lesson that I had to learn, with me retiring first and then my husband retiring, and then now we're in the season of just kind of like our own, going after our own goals and dreams. Like me, i'm like boy you need to be doing, because everything that he's going through I've already went through And so I'm trying to push him faster. But then God had to remind me, like the same way that you went through your season of preparation and groom, it is the same way that he has to go through it. I just can't rush that thing. I just can't rush it, not even for him, not even for him You're.

Speaker 2:

When we hear, like your gifts will make way for you, i walk into a room and someone says man, you wear your gift. Well, yeah, i'm like, knock the wind out of me, because so often we don't know how our gifts are like. We think our gifts are only shown when we're operating in a certain space. So your gift may be teaching. So you might think, like well, my gift is is only shown when I'm teaching. Or you may have the spirit of giving and you may think, oh well, it's only blah, blah, blah. Like no, because your gifts will speak for you before you even open your mouth. So that that was something that I had to kind of embrace as well. Is that, wow, my, my gifts are, are only, and people are seeing it? It's like one of the things that I think.

Speaker 2:

Another thing that we all struggle with is that we're trying to like man. What am I, what are my gifts, what are my gifts? I'm just ask. Ask the closest people around you, and they'll tell you and give you a clue.

Speaker 2:

Remember when we are going through each of these seasons. It's not about perfection, it's about finding harmony and fulfillment in a unique blend of roles we play as mothers and as individuals. That is something that we have to really think about, because it's like, remember, you're not going to always be motivated to go out and do the thing, but that's when self-discipline comes in and you have to know that what is being brought forth You know, the things that you need to do is greater than you. It is so much greater than you. There's going to be challenges that come along your way to deter you.

Speaker 2:

And that was me. Like I was so flooded with overwhelm for all the things that I wanted to accomplish and I just didn't know how I was going to get it done that I was just like, oh man, did it. You know, like this is not for me, and it's not the fact that plan changed is the fact that my execution has to change. Right, the plans that God gave me are still there, like the play is the play, baby, but we're gonna have to, you know, run this play at a different time. We got to run this play, you know, and at a later date. You know what I'm saying. So that's the thing like learning not to quit but to rest.

Speaker 2:

And so now I am just valuing, you know, every. I'm valuing each season. I'm loving the opportunities of growth, but I'm also welcoming this new spirit of resilience, because obviously That's something that I'm going to need. If you know, when I'm in August and I'm showing up as that girl Like I'm gonna need to be resilient in that space, i'm gonna need to be strong, i'm gonna need to be focused, and so I would say whatever you're struggling in at this moment, recognize that, the less developed part of you that you need to work on.

Speaker 2:

Remember, when you are doing all the things, like accomplishing your goals on after your dreams, you know you are setting an incredible example for your children. You're showing them what it looks like to truly pursue your dreams. You're teaching them the value of perseverance, determination and self-belief, but, beyond that, you are showing them that having ambition matters, but faith matters more. Let me say that again It's okay to have ambition, it's okay to want the thing, it's okay to go after success, but you have to have faith That the person that you're becoming, the person that you're growing to be, will come to pass. Trust that you have everything that it takes to succeed. I just want to leave this with y'all my booze, okay, to all the incredible moms out there listening I just want you to know that your dreams and your ambitions are worth the pursuit. Remember you have the. Remember you have the power to create a life that encompasses both motherhood and personal fulfillment. Embrace the power of focus. Take time to identify your passions, your goals and what truly likes you up and, once you have clarity, prioritize your time and your energy By taking attentional steps towards your aspirations. Greater is on the way, boo Well, that is the end of today's show.

Speaker 2:

I hope you enjoyed it. If we're not connected on Instagram, which is my favorite place to hang out, be sure to stop by and say hi at martini mama's podcast also. If you haven't done so, please follow, rate and review. A higher ratings and higher reviews mean more dope. Moms can find us and I keep bringing you fresh Mom content that matters until next Thursday. Be blessed.

Balancing Motherhood and Personal Success
Navigating Spiritual Seasons and Self-Discovery